The Number Field

We have arrived at the time in the pregnancy when we're reading the last chapters of all the baby books, which cover the trip to the hospital, labor, and delivery. We started to pack Jenny's hospital bag, and I'm making a list of all the food items that I need to get, so that I can survive a (hopefully not too) long labor and be at Jenny's side the whole time.

One book recommends that we prioritize our contact lists. The author points out that only a couple of people, most likely our parents, care enough to be woken up in the middle of the night by our phone call announcing the birth. Maybe even they would prefer that we wait. Next, there's a somewhat larger group who would appreciate a phone call during normal waking hours. Third is a group of people that would like to be notified by email as soon as reasonable. Finally, there are all of those who will be content to learn of the birth when they read about it on the blog or see my facebook status change.

If you would like to be in one of the first three groups, please let me or Jenny know. Send one of us an email, leave a comment on this post, or let us know somehow which group you would like to be in. I'll do my best to oblige.

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On Thursday I had the privilege of attending a baby shower. This one was co-ed, because Jenny's work colleagues threw it for her. Jenny chose to hold the shower at Abuelo's , which calls itself a "Mexican Food Embassy."

As with the previous shower, we really appreciate all of the gifts. In addition to the assortment of pink and purple clothing (including dresses, which we didn't have before), here are some of the presents that come to mind. We received a tummy pack , or at least that's what I remember calling it when my young siblings were in a similar contraption many years ago. Jenny has already started to use the penguin-shaped humidifier to help with her congestion and also possibly her itchy skin. We might have to get another one for the baby when she arrives, since Jenny might not want to let this one leave our room. Of special note is the diaper cake . I had never seen one of these before, but since Jenny's work group has had occasion to hold four baby showers over the past few months and one of her co-workers always brings a diaper cake, she had told me about them. We haven't dismantled the cake yet, but as I understand it, each layer is made of a bunch of diapers, rolled up in some way as to stay together in a circular shape. The layers are wrapped in towels or blankets, then pinned together. Finally, our diaper cake was decorated with a variety of small baby items, like small bottles of shampoo and lotion, tiny shoes and slippers, and so forth. A stuffed pink bunny holding a pacifier sits atop ours. This is Sunflower's first pacifier; I've already asked Jenny if we can call them nuk-nuks, as opposed to a binkies or other pacifier nicknames.

The diaper cake really impressed me with its cuteness and creativity. At the other shower, we received a gift of diapers, along with a card from the experienced mother who gave us the diapers. The card read in part

I didn't think diapers were a very exciting shower gift with my first baby, but after buying many packages I really appreciate any I get for free now!

I'm sure that once Sunflower arrives, I'll be impressed by the practicality of the diaper cake in addition to the cuteness and creativity. I don't have any pictures from the shower, but one of Jenny's co-workers took pictures, and I'll add some as soon as she gives copies to Jenny.

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Before anything else, I want to thank Christine for planning and executing a fantastic baby shower for Jenny. In addition, thanks to John and Karina for opening their house. Finally, thanks to everyone who came to the shower, or who wanted to come but had other obligations. Thanks for your gifts, of course, but also for your love and support as we get ready for the baby to arrive.

While Jenny was at the shower, I got to hang out and do manly stuff with Matt and Danny, who came up from Houston so that Carrie could go to the shower. We looked at the geese from the boathouse dock, and Matt asked Danny if he wanted to go swimming. Danny declined with great vigor, especially when Matt was holding him over the water. At our next destination, a park with a nice fountain , Danny brought a little Buzz Lightyear action figure that had been in the car. I don't know if he was influenced by the previous experience, but he decided that Buzz wanted to go swimming. Over and over again, he threw Buzz into the water and asked us to retrieve him. After doing this several times, we made Danny participate in the Buzz retrieval by holding him, upside down, over the water so that he could reach down and grab Buzz. I can't wait to do similar things with Sunflower, but I know that it will still be a couple of years before we can do that. I sent both of our cameras to the shower with Jenny, so I don't have any pictures.

Our third stop was Pluckers , where we had a lunch of fatty hot wings. Danny did some fun things there, too. Mostly, he made a huge mess, starting with when he dipped his corn dog into the ranch dressing, making the container overflow. Then he tried to stuff the whole thing in his mouth, and since it couldn't all fit, the hard-won ranch dressing dripped off onto his face. It continued from there.

While we were doing our boy stuff, Jenny was at her shower with Carrie and many other friends. By Jenny's reports, Christine and Karina had decorated the house wonderfully, in pink and brown, with balloons, roses, and even little onesies hung up as if on a clothesline. The onesies were more than just decoration, of course; they were yet another gift that will look even better on Sunflower than they did on the wall. Many of the guests brought nonfat foods to share, but the piece de resistance was a batch of nonfat chocolate cupcakes, special ordered by Christine. She brought most of them home, and we have been enjoying them together (since we don't want them to go bad).

There were too many people at the shower to play the typical baby shower games. Instead, Christine had asked me to write some funny stories that she could read to the guests. Here's one that she recounted:

When we were dating (still several months before we got engaged), we went to a fourth of July picnic. The other attendees were mostly families with small children, but it wasn't people we knew very well, so we didn't know many of the kids' names, and only picked up on them when their parents called them. Like I said, we didn't know anyone very well, so we were talking to each other, and against this backdrop got on the topic of childrens' names. We were in the process of hashing out some good names, when a lady sitting near us said "I couldn't help but overhearing. Are you expecting?" She said this loud enough that our host heard, and quickly jumped in, apparently embarassed, and said "No, they're just dating" and then turned the conversation in some other direction. Ever since then, however, we've been set for baby names--the one we're using is the one we picked out that day for our first girl.

The others were about my adventures in buying a home pregnancy test, and how Jewel is responding to the pregnancy.

When I met up with Jenny after the shower, she said "opening presents is hard work!" I can understand what she means, since there were so many of them. Along with the numerous cute outfits, blankets, washcloths, and stuffed animals, many people pitched in for one big gift, a travel system consisting of a stroller and car seat. Apparently, some of the shower attendees thought that I would be anti-stroller, perhaps because of this post about our experience registering for baby things. First, I want to say that I was never anti-stroller. At that time, the stroller became a symbol of my doubts and fears about the unknown experiences ahead. Second, I want to express my thanks for this gift in particular; I am deeply touched by this act of kindness. All at once I felt relief about not having to make what seemed like an overwhelming decision, and I now feel prepared for Sunflower's first days of life. Special thanks again to Christine for organizing the coalition, then researching, purchasing, and even putting together the stroller.

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We had our first post-holiday visit with Dr. Cherry on Wednesday. Both Jenny and I came away from the visit with the impression that Dr. Cherry is in the right profession. She came in and said "you're getting so close now!" with a big grin on her face. We could really tell how much she loves babies, Sunflower included.

With Jenny's dietary needs, we had somewhat of a difficult time with nutrition while we were traveling. Our families did a good job of taking care of us, but it was hard to find low-fat, calorie-dense foods while on the road and in the airports. Jenny found herself in the sad position of wanting to gain weight over the holidays (which is everyone's dream), but not being able to eat all the good foods. Once we got back to Texas, I pumped her full of berry smoothies, and hoped that she wouldn't have lost weight since the last doctor's visit.

I'm happy to report that she maintained her weight. Dr. Cherry commented that we would still prefer to see her adding a little weight, since the baby continues to grow, and anything she doesn't get from food, she takes from Jenny's body. However, she listened to Sunflower's heartbeat, and it sounded strong and healthy. She also measured Jenny's tummy, and the measurement was perfect, so she said that she's not worried at all. At our next visit in a week and a half, we'll have a final sonogram. At that point, we should be able to tell if the baby is in position and ready to go.

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I'm sorry for the inactivity of the blog this week. I have been living the inverse of the old proverb "if you want something done, give it to a busy person." Since my spring semester doesn't start for another week, I've had nothing urgent to do, so I've done nothing at all.

While at my parents' house, I continued the process of separating the artifacts of my past into an object and a memory. As long as the memory is preserved, the object can be discarded. As Jenny says, it's not my parents' responsibility to take care of all of my old junk. During past visits, I got rid of hopelessly out of fashion old clothes. (I think I still could have fit into them, because I wore baggy clothes in high school and haven't grown all that much since then.)

This time, I mostly went through boxes of all my academic stuff, mostly from high school. I photographed old sports tropies and the pages of composition books where I had written essays and journal entries that earned good grades. Jenny was astonished by the fact that I kept the certificates from every award and accolade I ever received, even though the bulk of them were so minor as to be of no consequence. I removed those from their decorative folders and brought them back to Texas, where I plan to scan them, along with assignments and reports that were more lengthy than the ones contained in the composition notebooks. I looked through our computer area for old floppy disks that might contain digital copies of those reports, but I no longer own a floppy drive, and the computer programs that could read the files are now obsolete, so the hard copies are probably the best I can do anyway.

More to the point, on the last night that we were there, my mom brought out the treasure box with things from my earliest childhood. Going through the layers, I rediscovered books that I had created as school projects in elementary and middle school--those must have made an impression on me, since I continue to be a book maker (and even plan to turn this blog into a book). At the very bottom was my baby book, the ultimate object of our search. We hoped that by reading it we would gain insight and strength for Sunflower's birth.

The baby book confirmed the details that I had discovered in a report that I wrote in seventh grade, and found in one of the boxes. The assignment must have been to research and report on the current events on the day of my birth, at the personal, local, national, and international levels. Jenny is worried about how big our baby will be, and gave me the stink eye after learning that I was nine pounds, six and a half ounces, which, as far as she is concerned, is way too big (she most often uses the word "monster" to describe my baby size). The report quotes my mother's journal records about how she was having back labor and contractions, but still did all of the housework, including laundry, vacuuming, and washing dishes before my father came home and they headed to the hospital. I came quickly once they were at the hospital; they got there in the afternoon and I was born at 7:42 pm.

Jenny had also planned to go through keepsakes and remembrances at her mother's house, but never got around to it. We did look at the formal dresses her mother saved from Jenny's high school dances. Although it is hard to part with them, we think that we can donate them to an organization that reworks them for current teenagers. We brought one back to try this; the designated donation event is in a couple of months. While we were there, we neglected to look at Jenny's baby book. However, when her mother came to Austin this weekend for the baby shower (more about that soon), she brought the baby book and we looked at it yesterday evening. Jenny was no small baby herself, tipping the scales at eight pounds, four ounces. She claims that this is average, but I don't think it's that different from me. We learned from her baby book that she was a very contented baby from a young age. She always loved to eat, pick on her older brother David, and squeeze the kittens. Her family always had kittens. We can only hope that Sunflower will share all of those attributes, along with Jenny's love for chocolate milk.

We don't yet have a baby keepsake book, and want to get one soon. Our Lamaze teacher told us that if we bring it to the hospital, the nurse will put Sunflower's hand and foot prints in it at the same time that she does the official copies. She pointed out that the nurse has lots of experience doing this and will do a good job, whereas if we try it at home we will end up with a blurry smudge on the page and ink all over the floor.

I like the fact that my baby book was customized for our religion, and had special pages about the blessing, etc. However, even with the vast reaches of the internet, I can only find one or two LDS baby book options-- this is the most common one, and I'm not sure that I like it, even after only seeing the cover. If you have seen this book or have other suggestions, please leave a comment.

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As nice as it was to be with family for the holidays, I'm glad that we've returned to the calm of Austin. For one thing, it means that we're coming down the home stretch of the pregnancy, and we can focus completely on preparations for Sunflower's arrival. (We looked at lots of cribs online today, and have picked a favorite.) I apologize for the lack of posts; I've been sick since last Saturday. I've decided to organize my Christmas posts by topic, starting with tales from the road (and air).

We left Austin on Monday, December 22. All was calm at the Austin airport, but our flight to Baltimore connected through O'Hare in Chicago. All day Sunday we heard news about terrible weather across the north half of the country, culminating in myriad travel delays and flight cancellations, many in Chicago. Our flight to Chicago was delayed, but arrived not far behind schedule. We were glad that we didn't have to venture into the zero degree temperatures outside. As we walked down the terminal from our arrival gate to the departure gate, we saw hundreds of people in line to get a chance to talk to the customer service desk. Our flight was one of the lucky ones, since it departed, albeit a bit late. Because of that we didn't arrive at my parents' house until 2:45 am. On Tuesday, more flights out of Chicago were cancelled, and our annoyance at the late arrival dissipated.

Thanks to Priceline.com , we had a nice rental car at a good price. Even so, we had a less than enjoyable Tuesday drive from Maryland to Lynchburg, Virginia. For one thing, we hadn't enjoyed a full night's sleep. For another, we went through some weird traffic on the way to Lynchburg. It was heavy through Washington, D.C., and when we left the freeway, we had to navigate through what seemed like a hundred stoplights, all carefully calibrated to make our trip as slow as possible. Finally, when we got past Charlottesville and almost to our destination, we ran into a stretch where one of two lanes was closed so that emergency crews could deal with a tractor trailer that had rolled over several hours earlier. By the last half-hour of the drive, I had turned into a zombie.

Fast forward to Sunday and the beginning of the return trip, when we planned drove back to Baltimore. I had been up all night with a stomach virus, and didn't even go to church, so that I could try to rest up before we embarked. We considered extending our stay with Jenny's mother, but I wanted to recuperate in my parents' home, where I thought I would be more comfortable. When Jenny got back from church, we headed out. This time, our trip was much smoother, and even with numerous rest breaks, our door-to-door time was at least an hour shorter. We feared dropping temperatures and possible icy precipitation, but didn't run into either. Alas, none of our dreams of wintry weather came true, even though at various times we saw forecasts for a white Christmas or New Year's Day in the locations of our visit.

After several days with my family, during which my virus passed and was followed by a gross cold, we had to take the last leg of our travels, the flight home. After our early morning start yesterday, Jenny didn't feel well on the plane. Because of this a wonderful grandmotherly flight attendant took notice and looked after us until we got to Chicago. In Chicago, we experienced no delays. Our flight was full of families with children. One woman had been assigned to a seat far away from her children; she was far back in the plane, but her son was on our row up near the front, and her daughter was in the row behind us. A good-hearted grandmother, assigned to the last seat on our row, took care of the kids during the flight. The little boy just about talked her ear off. Nevertheless, this kind woman also tried to make Jenny's flight easier; offering her both encouragement and magazines.

I experienced one last inconvenience. As I am still recovering from a cold, when we descended in Chicago I couldn't get my ears to pop and equalize the pressure, and went through some severe pain. After we landed, the pain subsided, but I felt as if I was hearing everything underwater. At high altitude during the second flight I felt better, but experienced the same problem when we descended into Austin. I did a little research on the internet, and learned that I could have prepared better for this "airplane ear," a condition that most often affects cold sufferers. After it hits, there aren't as many treatment options aside from waiting it out. Things improved last night; Jenny recommended holding my head in a sideways position, and that seemed to drain the pressure, although it would return when I returned my head to an upright position. When I woke up this morning, I could tell that something was still not quite right, but it was much improved. I'm sure that in a day or two I'll be fully recovered, from my ears to my nose and throat and everything else. It's a small price to pay for good holidays and fun times with family. I'll write about all that soon. (Although it can't be soon enough: at one point I told my family that I was live-blogging our improvised Balderdash game. I think they were disappointed that I wasn't!)

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We gave and received presents in lots of places over the past two weeks. We started out in Austin before we left, because we wanted to travel light, and continued with Christmas gifts until mere minutes before we left my parents' home for the airport and our return flight to Texas. Many of the gifts that we received have something to do with Sunflower, although some of the connections are less obvious than others. Beginning with the most obvious, here are the gifts that come to mind. (I hope I remember all of them; we are thankful for everything, but my memory might not be complete.)

The grandparents bought clothes for Sunflower. Jenny's mom and her husband Kevin travelled to Lyon, France this autumn on business. While they were there, they found a lovely little jumper and pair of tights, along with a sweater. I won't retell the funny story of their troubles in buying it, but it highlighted the cultural differences in shopping. My parents gave Sunflower a Christmas-themed outfit that should fit next year. Jenny's father and his wife Renee sent us some money. We haven't decided what to do with it yet, but I'm sure that some of it will help us to prepare for Sunflower.

Jenny gave me a parenting book, Be Prepared ( Amazon link), written especially for guys like me. I did catch her reading it too, so we should both be able to use it. I have already found numerous useful tips. Just before Christmas, I took my car to get an oil change and state inspection. While it was in the shop, I went to some nearby stores to browse and shop. At one of them, I saw this very book and that evening reported on it to Jenny, hoping to give her the hint that I might like a copy for Christmas. Little did I know that she had already purchased and wrapped it!

For my part, I gave Jenny a gift certificate for a prenatal massage. When I purchased it, the receptionist told me that their massage therapist is a prenatal massage specialist who also leads classes about baby massage. Jenny will ask for more details about that when she goes in for the massage. We're looking at our calendars now and trying to find a good time to schedule it. Unlike most gift certificates, this one has a definite expiration date, and it's possible that date could be sooner than we know!

My sister Laura, with help from my sister Leisa, her husband Sam, and my mother, gave us a beautiful baby quilt. Laura was very anxious that we would actually use the quilt and not just store it away in a closet--we promised that we would use it. My family sometimes wraps and presents not-quite-finished gift projects, and this was one of them; when we first received it, the edge seams still needed to be done. My mother stayed up entirely too late on the night before we left so that she could finish it (along with a quilted Christmas tree skirt that she made for us) before we left. My brother and his wife gave my parents a high chair for their house. In fact, the gift is to all those who bring small children to my parents' home. So far, my brother has had the only grandchildren, but we're next, and my sister is due just six weeks after us. We'll almost certainly visit sometime when Sunflower is of high chair age, and will be happy to enjoy this present.

Now it's time to explain some of the gifts with a more tenuous connection to the baby. Jenny gave me two new pairs of pajama pants, to replace my one threadbare set. Be Prepared warns me that babies are messy, so it will be good to have a clean pair of pajamas after Sunflower spits up on one set. Jenny received a new robe from her mom, which will help her to feel warm and cozy at the hospital and in the possibly dreary postpartum days.

Jenny, her mother, and her brother Mark gave me two new kitchen knives and a fancy pair of kitchen shears that comes apart for easy cleaning. In the late stages of the pregnancy, I'm already in charge of the kitchen more than ever before, and I anticipate that things will remain this way after the baby arrives. I love sharp and sturdy knives, and these will make my cooking duties easier and quicker. I amused Jenny's mom: after offering to help make dinner one night and being assigned a chopping task, I retrieved my new knife to try it out. On a slightly sad note, because of the new knives, we're getting rid of a host of now redundant knives. Among these are several that I received as a Christmas gift many years ago, during my best Christmas ever. My sisters teamed up to buy me a complete kitchen set--pots and pans, kitchen utensils, knives, and so forth. Then, due to the fact that in my family we open our presents one at a time, in order of age, so it's easy to see who has the most presents, they unboxed the set and wrapped each item individually. It was the only year that I unseated my youngest brother from his customary "most presents" title. I still have a few items from the set, but by now have replaced most of them with newer models. I will always have fond memories of that Christmas.

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Apologies for the long time since my last post. I'm preparing a couple of items about our Christmas vacation, and the lovely presents we received--especially those related to Sunflower. In the meantime, I have added the option to receive blog updates via email. Click on the link to the right, enter your email address, then confirm your subscription via the email that you receive.

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I'm happy to report that Jenny has been doing well with her new low-fat diet. I have a couple of quick observations.

• Many "reduced fat" and "low fat" foods are only low in fat when compared to the original versions, but don't meet the stringent standards to which we're adhering.
• It's possible to buy non-fat ice cream and non-fat mayonnaise, but there doesn't seem to be any non-fat butter substitute. This seems odd.
• In a similar vein, the only non-fat chocolate we can find is Hershey's syrup. We need help finding non-fat chocolate candy, but fear that it's an impossible dream.
• In order to keep Jenny's calorie count up (pregnancy is not a time to lose weight!), we have to increase her protein and sugar intake. To that end, we've started to make smoothies. And today a friend gave us a sample of some protein powder. We'll try it out.
• Some supplements seem to help, e.g. papaya extract pills, which aid in digestion. The friend who gave us the protein powder said that fiber should also help, so Jenny's going to take more of it. We trust this friend, because he's very knowledgeable about nutrition, and also studying to be a doctor of pharmacy.
• With time and thought, we have found plenty of good dishes. For breakfast, we can make oatmeal, eggs, pancakes, and french toast with only minor modifications.

On another front, with the semester over I've turned to a couple of projects. Jewel (our cat) regularly petitions us to go outside at inconvenient times. She's usually quite insistent and loud. Some time ago, we bought a kitty door, but didn't have anywhere to put it. I finally took some time to pursue the project, and installed it in a spare board, which I then secured in the window. I thought that Jewel would be happy to use this new convenience, but she resisted my efforts to get her through. When Jenny came home, she used her advanced cat training skills to demonstrate the process, and with further practice Jewel has started to get the picture. We hope that she'll get the process down before Sunflower comes. Finally, we're cleaning the apartment, doing the laundry, and preparing for our holiday travel. We'll be on the road a lot, and Jenny is worried that it will tire her out, but we're looking forward to seeing our families.

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Over the years, I've put lots of different things up on the web. On the internet, nothing is ever really gone, and yet I haven't yet linked to any of it here. The raison d'etre of the internet is to link things together, and since it's the holiday season and people won't have much time to spend looking through my past foolishness, it's a good time to put up a couple of signposts. One summer I had an email address and a web page but my best friend had neither, although he did visit the library regularly, and had access to the internet there. So he would email me, which he could do directly from his web browser, and then I would post my responses to a webpage. Consider it a proto-blog. Except for us, nobody read it--not because we actively locked it down, but because only we knew it even existed. Some time later, we played with a program that pretended to be a psychiatrist named Eliza, then posted the resulting conversations , some of which I have preserved.

Before Youtube existed, I posted my video productions to my own webpage . I continue to do so--maybe you could call me a Youtube luddite. After more than two years of the footage sitting on my hard drive, this summer I finished one video that tells the start of the story that led to this blog. It's in the wrong format for embedding, but should play fine when you click the link.

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