The Number Field

We did not wake Elena up early on Friday; there were no Black Friday deals that we really wanted, although Jenny did brave the cold to get a few small things. We had our fill of shopping before Friday last week.

Jenny scheduled a family portrait session at a nearby Picture People , because she had been pleased with the service and results she got there when they solicited her for a walk-in appointment over the summer. That meant we needed matching clothes, and after reviewing our wardrobes and choosing themes, last Monday we went to a mall that we hadn't visited before.

We stayed together through the first few stores, but it soon became clear that Elena didn't have the patience to keep doing that, so Jenny kept shopping while Elena and I did our own thing. She enjoyed watching the child-sized train running through the hallway; when it went by, she said choo-choo and pumped her arm. We looked at the Christmas-themed window decorations at a makeup store. To Elena, the piled-up ornaments were just lots and lots of balls.

At the back of the children's clothing store where Jenny was shopping we found a big TV set up to entertain children so their moms could shop in peace; we let it draw us in for a few minutes. We watched some parents trying to get pictures of their infants with Santa Claus; it didn't seem to be working out.

At one store, Elena appeared to be a very sophisticated shopper. She went into a different children's clothing store, browsed the stuffed animals, then led me right back out. At other store fronts, she noticed pictures of dogs and other animals, and pointed out the colors of the clothes on display.

When we walked by a store that had music playing, we stopped at the entrance to dance. A kiosk saleswoman noticed Elena doing this and gave her a free gift--a little beanbag that can be microwaved to provide heated relief to sore muscles. Emboldened by that success, and after a visit to the animals in the Build-a-Bear workshop, Elena acted extra cute when we walked by the next kiosk, where chocolates were on display. It worked again--the saleswoman gave us a mint chocolate crisp.

Coming around a corner, we spotted an oasis just past the Pillow Pets : the mall playground. Elena joined right in. She went back and forth between running with the big kids, and manning the boat fixture with a little baby. As usual, she got lots of compliments from other parents in the area.

When I called Jenny to let her know where we were, the call went to voice mail, because we had inadvertently brought Jenny's cell phone in the stroller. She eventually found us, and we talked Elena into leaving the playground. We had one more quick stop on our way out--Jenny found some pennies in her wallet, and we taught Elena to throw them into the fountain, although we're not sure that she made any wishes.

This weekend we welcomed my sister Leisa and her husband Sam. It was her birthday, so we tried to treat them well. It was also a good chance for them to spend quality time with Elena, and I think we made the most of it.

A long nap interfered with our plans to go shopping before they arrived at our house, so we all went together instead. At the first store they helped us to pick a Christmas dress for Elena. At the next store, we used a divide-and-conquer strategy to finish quickly, so that dinner wouldn't get pushed back any further.

Leisa requested lasagna for dinner, so that's what we made even though it was already late. With teamwork, we managed to get it on the table at a reasonable time. After dinner Elena wanted to sing and dance, so we joined in with a few rounds of Popcorn Popping and Ring Around the Rosies . But then it was time for bed--Leisa and Sam joined us for family prayer, and Elena gave them big goodnight hugs. After Elena's bedtime, we played our favorite grown-up games of shape and color: Blokus and Set . Sam and Leisa won pretty easily.

After a breakfast of waffles, and with thanks again to our guests for watching Elena while we finished preparing for church, we headed out, but not before some more dance time, including lots of twirling. At church we once again watched Sam and Leisa ably provide child care. There was one tense moment: while looking at a picture book Elena spotted a cow and did what she normally does--let out a moo at her normal animal-sounds volume, which is loud. Sam turned the page quickly.

In the afternoon we headed to my parents' house for a family dinner. When we got into separate cars, Elena was sad and gave big hugs to Leisa and Sam. At this point, Sam said something to the effect of "now she's just angling for better presents!"

Even though Elena struggled on the drive to the grandparents', she was happy to see them. She wanted to thank Gran Ann in person for her new hand-knitted slippers. They're just the right size, and she loves wearing them, whether it's on her bare feet or over layers of socks and pajamas. They're especially good for twirling.

After dinner, we sat down for a second game night, this time Yahtzee. At first Elena wanted to roll all the dice, but Gran Ann pulled out a box of colored pencils that drew her attention away from the game. As for the game, after I rolled a Yahtzee, I thought I had it in the bag, but Jenny pulled ahead for the win at the end. With that, we said our goodbyes--Elena gave big hugs to everyone.

It's been a quiet week around here, because Jenny and Elena were gone for most of it. It's a funny thing--after you move closer to family, you spend more time with them. Jenny's mom still has two boys at home who need an adult presence in the house. So Jenny offered to go down and provide that presence so her mom and mom's husband could go on a well-deserved vacation for a few days.

Jenny and Elena had a good time while they were away. Jenny listed several specific details that contributed to the fun. For one thing, their cat Misty is more friendly and patient with Elena than Jewel is. For another, the boys helped to take care of Elena. They also showed their appreciation: Nick, Jenny's stepbrother, slipped a lovely thank-you note under her door the morning that they left..

I missed them greatly while they were gone, but managed to keep myself very busy. It's the time of year when we're putting together our family Christmas packages , the theme and contents of which remain a closely-held secret. As usual, I fell in love with an idea that requires a major effort to implement, so I worked late into the evenings most of the time they were gone. The results look promising, so I'm glad that I stuck with it. Jenny accurately foresaw the difficulties and doubted my ability to carry out the project, but I won her over when she saw a finished item.

I'm sure that Elena has grown noticeably taller in the week that she was gone, and every day she communicates better. Right now she loves looking at the moon and stars. It's very nice to have them back.

I've actually gone from loneliness to extra family, because my sister Leisa is in town and it's her birthday today. If you've been reading regularly, you know that can mean only one thing: cake pops . We found a perfect flavor combination--chocolate cake and frosting for the interior, dipped in a peanut butter candy coating. Jenny made cake pops for her family, and now she's fully invested and trying to improve our process, so we added sprinkles as an extra twist. We went out to dinner last night and ate most of the sprinkled pops before taking pictures of them. However, we expect that the holiday season will be full of cake-popportunities.

On Thursday, we made our first family trip to enjoy our nation's capital. It isn't far away, and we knew that, but it was still a pleasant surprise for the trip to take less than half an hour from home to parking.

Our first stop was the National Building Museum , a popular destination for families with young children. Elena loved it as soon as we walked in--she examined the Lego model of the building for a while, but soon enough the fountain in the middle of the great hall drew her attention. We made our way to the Building Zone, where there were so many different things to do that Elena just raced from one to the other, unwilling to settle down.

Because of that, we soon gave up our spots in that room to return to the great hall. By this time, there were different types of blocks and building supplies spread out all over. Elena settled in for some quality building time with Mega Bloks. She only has a small set at home, so she loved having a large collection available. Despite the large supply, she didn't want to share with other kids--it was good practice for her; hopefully she realized that there was enough to go around.

The building museum did have some exhibits for grownups. We went through one about the World Fairs and Exhibitions of the 1930s. There were a few other people in there, none with children, but they didn't seem to mind Elena. She wasn't disruptive, but she did want to name the shapes and animals she saw in the pictures and has not yet found a museum-appropriate vocal volume.

After a snack, we took a leisurely stroll over to the Old Post Office Pavilion , home to the best view of the city outside of the Washington Monument. The previous evening, just by chance, a friend who I haven't seen since we were in the same mission ten years ago, sent me a message. He lives around DC, and we decided to meet up for lunch. It was great to see him, meet his wife and baby, and catch up. As a bonus, we got to hear live music . Elena started dancing right away, and even tried out some new moves.

Our original plans included a stop at the Natural History museum, but Jenny could tell that Elena was tired, so we opted to walk around instead. We strolled through the sculpture garden, where Elena was particularly taken by an Alexander Calder sculpture--perhaps she was comparing it to the mobiles for which he is more famous. Our next pause was at the pool in front of the Capitol building. Elena loves the water, and before long she and Jenny were chasing pigeons and seagulls while I tried to take pictures.

By then it was time to start heading back. I thought I knew DC pretty well, because of frequent trips there in my youth, but I realized how little I had seen. Somehow, we always gravitated to the same few museums. On our way from the Capitol out, we walked through a lovely park in between courthouses and administrative buildings; I'm sure there are hundreds of places like that to discover and enjoy. While there, some people directed our attention to a fierce-looking hawk enjoying an afternoon snack.

We didn't go directly to the car, because we wanted to return to a cupcake shop we had walked past earlier in the day. We split one cupcake; it was so rich, with ganache icing, that Jenny was sad we didn't get more. It's definitely on our list of places to visit again.

Between there and the car we criss-crossed past the Verizon center and through Chinatown, imagining all the while what it would be like to live down there. Elena started talking to herself--every day, the sounds seem more intelligible. She fell asleep almost as soon as we strapped her in; this time, it would have been better to have a longer drive, as she woke up when we got home and wouldn't go back down. Still, a short nap was a price we were willing to pay for such a fun day.

Our church youth had an activity this evening at a corn maze. Last week I heard that they were looking for chaperones. I thought people would jump at the opportunity, because Jenny and I have always talked about how fun it would be to go through a corn maze. When I emailed the person in charge, he said that they didn't have many chaperones and we would be welcome to come along--we could even bring Elena. The place was only about twenty minutes away from us; later in the evening we met some new people who had to drive an hour and half to get there.

When the time came to enter the maze, they first asked the youth to sort themselves into groups of eight to ten. Then they told the adults to go find a group to accompany through the maze. While we were wandering around trying to find someone who could pair us with a group, we heard someone nearby calling our names. We didn't really think that anyone there knew us, so it was a bit of a surprise. Then we saw that it was two girls from our ward, one of whom was Elena's babysitter a few weeks ago. It felt good to be wanted.

The maze itself seemed about the right size and difficulty for us. We went in circles a couple of times. Some of our group wanted to stay in there longer, and intentionally led us down the wrong paths. Elena did very well. She took turns walking and being carried by Jenny and me. Whenever we got a little behind, the kids stopped to wait for us. It was still light when we entered the maze, but before long we had to start using our flashlights, which Elena liked.

After a while, we could tell that Elena was ready to be out, as were some of the group members. They outvoted those who just wanted to stay in the maze, and we stopped to look at the map for long enough to figure out where we needed to go. The deciding factor was the promise of hot chocolate once we got out. Once the decision was made, I was impressed with how quickly we got on the right track.

In addition to hot chocolate there was also a bonfire and makings for s'mores. Jenny toasted the first marshmallow and shared with Elena and me, then Elena and I did the second marshmallow. Elena liked warming up next to the fire--even though she was wearing her new winter coat, it was still chilly, especially for her ears and fingers. She wouldn't keep her hood up, and we don't yet have any mittens for her. Still, she was well behaved and mostly happy for the whole evening, and ran around enough to be ready for bed as soon as we returned home.

At first I was not a huge fan of Elena's costume, but after I saw her wearing it, she and Jenny won me over. I thought it was too big--it is big enough that it might still fit her next year--but even that turned out to be a good thing.

Since Halloween fell on a Sunday, we decided not to go trick or treating that night. However, we did have four events where costumed Elena made an appearance: Music Makers, two trunk or treats, and a parade. On Wednesday at Music Makers, most of the songs were Halloween-themed. Jenny told me that today the words to the songs have now changed to focus on Thanksgiving, but the tunes seem to be mostly the same.

At the trunk or treat Wendesday evening, I agreed to help direct traffic. The reason they asked me: as a bike rider, they assumed I would have a reflective vest. After my assignment was over, the vest served double duty as my costume for the evening.

We had spent several weeks teaching Elena to say "trick or treat." She wasn't always cooperative--she didn't yet know what it was for--but when the time came, she could say her version, rih-ree , pretty well. When she realized that merely by saying that, people would put candy in her bucket, she suddenly had a greater incentive to perform. We also made sure that she said thank you at every trunk. In sign language, thank you is pretty close to blowing kisses, so that's what lots of people thought she was doing.

On Saturday, we heard about a community parade. We weren't entirely sure about the timeline so we ended up waiting around for a little while, but it was all worth it when the parade came through. Elena loved waving at the fire truck, police cars, girl scouts, and the marching band. After the band passed by us, all the kids in costume joined in and followed them along the route. Elena took it all in stride--she kept on waving at everybody, but had changed from spectator to participant.

After long afternoon naps, we headed up to the Fall Festival activity for my parents' church ward. It was a multi-faceted event, with carnival games, a pot luck barbeque dinner, a talent show/karaoke segment, and a trunk or treat at the end. Elena especially enjoyed the hay ride. The sun was setting by dinner time, and none of us could figure out why we were eating outside; it seemed too cold for comfort. This was where Elena's big costume came in handy--there was enough room for us to put her jacket on underneath for extra warmth. During the talent show, one act stood out. Someone who had dressed up as a witch gave a solid rendition of a song from Wicked . Elena was standing right in front of the stage, transfixed by the performance. She's going to be a musical lover like Jenny.

At the trunk or treat we got even more candy; this time Elena knew just what to say. She wanted them to put the candy in her hand, and then she would very carefully place it in her bag before saying thanks. It seems that Elena has a healthier relationship with candy than I do. She likes to eat it, but doesn't demand it, and can stop after one piece. Good for her.

Elena has started to notice and talk about bikes. The girl next door has a purple bike that they keep next to their front staircase, and when we walk by Elena likes to give their scarecrow a hug and try to get on the bike. At a large consignment sale last weekend, Elena and I looked at the toys while Jenny browsed the racks of clothes. There was a bike that was too large, but Elena climbed up on it and had me roll her around.

I've been enjoying my bike by riding to and from work about twice per week. The first time I made the trip, I had a flat tire misadventure, but since then it's been smooth sailing. A good fraction of my route is along a paved bike trail that used to be a rail line, so it's mostly flat. In addition, I don't have to worry about traffic and it's a beautiful place to ride. The first part of my ride is on a lightly-travelled country road, while the last segment does follow a busier road, but it has a wide shoulder and there are signs posted that warn the drivers to watch for bikes. Even though the ride takes about twice as much time as my drive, I enjoy it immensely more. I hope I can maintain my resolve when the weather turns colder.

Whether driving or riding, the moment I arrive home is a highlight of my day. When it's warm enough, Jenny leaves the front door open, although the storm door is still closed. I think she tells Elena to go look for me, because she's frequently standing at the door looking for me, and her face lights up when she sees me.

Seeing Elena smile sometimes causes me to think about how my life is different now than it used to be. Along with the time of year and bike riding, it brought to mind a story that I want to put in writing. Maybe someday Elena will learn from this--it's probably on the list of the top five stupid and dangerous things I've done.

Halloween 2003 was unseasonably warm in western Massachusetts. It was a Friday, and I knew that it would be a great day to go for a ride on my new bike. I was working at an elementary school, and decided that I could leave right at 3:30, head straight home, and get right on the bike for a 50 mile loop up through Bennington, Vermont.

I don't remember what happened, but I stayed late work, then it took extra time to get home and get all ready for the ride. I'm sure it was at least 5:30 or 5:45 by the time I clipped into the pedals, and the light was already fading. I must have recognized this to some extent, because I brought along my camping headlamp, but I didn't let it deter me. I pedaled into Vermont with the twilight.

Although I had looked at my route, I didn't realize how hard it would be to find my way once night fell. I was lucky that there weren't many places to turn--whenever I reached an intersection, I turned left. Before long it was pitch black. My headlamp didn't have a range to match the speed of the bike. The starlight was enough to make the white stripe on the border of the road barely visible, so I had something to follow. Rarely cars came by in the other direction; I averted my eyes from the headlights so I wouldn't lose my night vision adaptation.

I don't think Google maps existed back then. Whatever I had used instead didn't show the terrain. I should have known, but didn't think that I would first have to climb a mountain, then descend into the valley below. The slow climb was manageable, but the lengthy descent frightened me. I usually enjoy the effortless speed of going downhill, a reward for the effort of the climb, but it wasn't nearly as fun without the benefit of sight.

At long last houses, street lamps, and other marks of civilization began to appear. As I drew closer to town, I saw people in Halloween costumes: kids trick-or-treating and teenagers and college students going to or coming from parties. It occurred to me that even on this night of oddities I was still probably a strange sight to behold.

I decided to end my ride in Bennington. It was already late, and as I later learned, the road I would have taken home has no shoulder and probably would have been incredibly dangerous. However I didn't have a cell phone; I didn't even have a quarter to make a phone call. I stopped at the first open gas station I could find, borrowed a quarter from the clerk, and tried calling everyone I knew. It seemed like nobody was home, but I finally got in touch with Jim Law. I have many reasons to be forever grateful to him, but this one will always stand out. He rescued me, and I resolved never again to go for a night ride like that one.

Jenny and I try to have Family Home Evening with Elena every Monday night. Usually we try to read a short story from the Friend , sing a song, and say a prayer, but it's always felt like an uphill battle. I didn't have high expectations; she was still very young, but it's still hard to practice and build habits.

Today, however, things started to fit together. Elena still didn't realize that this was time set aside with a special purpose, but we all had a great time tonight. We started with a game of Hide and Seek. I hid first, and Jenny had to prod Elena to look for me on the other side of the kitchen island. After the first round she got the idea and a good time finding Jenny in the bedroom closet and me under the bed. She even took a turn hiding in the closet.

After the game we read a story about an old-time girl whose father sacrificed his own shoes to make some for her. I don't think Elena could have understood the whole story, but she was listening and reacted when she heard words she knew, like 'shoes' and 'feet.'

After story time, we sang a song that Jenny and Elena learned at the Music Makers group that meets every week. We sang a song about a little spider and how she moves--hopping, stomping, spinning, crawling, and jumping. After a chorus of "Ring Around the Rosies," our formal Family Home Evening time was done, but we kept playing. Elena showed us how well she could jump--she can sometimes get both feet off the ground.

After that, Elena asked very nicely if we could play with bubbles. We followed that with some swinging around and vigorous dancing. She and I danced together, then alone, then we each danced with a doll. It had the desired effect: by the time we were done, she was tired and ready for bed. It was a good evening.

Happy birthday to Jenny! I think that we've given her a nice long birthday weekend, starting on Thursday--her actual birthday. Elena took a long afternoon nap. We went to a fun place called Homestead Gardens to find a pumpkin, and in the process found a straw-bale maze and petting zoo. Jenny seems like her presents, and appreciated the cards and facebook birthday wishes!

Yesterday I took Elena up to her grandparents' house for the night. Jenny and I went out to dinner at a Mexican restaurant, in honor of her childhood, when she always wanted tacos for her birthday dinner. Then we rented a movie and watched it at home, extra cozy because we lit a fire in our fireplace for the first time. We had waffles this morning before going to pick Elena up and run errands.

To tell the rest of the story, I have to go back to before last weekend. I had wanted to go camping with my parents and sister at some point this fall, and last weekend seemed to be a good option. However, Jenny's family was also coming into town because her brother was going through the temple for the first time. I had promised to try to make an ice cream cake for Jenny's birthday, and decided that it would be better to make it while her family was here so that they could help us eat it, as it would have been unwise for us to eat the entire cake alone, even with Elena's help.

With good reason, Jenny worried that my camping plans would interfere with the rest of the weekend. Even though my original plan had been to take Elena camping with me, we decided against that because we weren't sure how she would handle it, and didn't want to leave a sleep-deprived baby with a sitter for several hours while we went to the temple. I got home at the right time on Saturday morning so we wouldn't have to rush too much, but I didn't have enough time to start the cake.

That was a critical error--when we got back that afternoon, I just didn't have enough time to make the cake properly. In my naivety, I thought it would all work out. I made the cake, molded the ice cream into a spring form pan, and stacked it all up. Instead of frosting, we poured on a homemade cookies and whipped cream mixture, which Jenny's stepbrother Nick helped to make. As we were pouring it on and returning the cake to the freezer, I could already see the ice cream melting out from between the two layers of cake.

It wasn't a total loss--the cake was tasty, but I'm not sure it could really be called an ice cream cake by the time we ate it later that evening. It was mostly just a normal cake on a bed of half-melted ice cream. It was good that I thought to put the cake stand on a cookie sheet before putting it back in the freezer. I think I just needed to give it more lead time. I should have made everything the night before, so that it would have had time to hard freeze before assembly. But I was out camping instead.

To redeem myself, on Wednesday night I prepared a new and different cake-based dessert item. I had heard about cake pops from my mother and read about them on the internet, and determined I should try to make them for Jenny's birthday. The hardest part was finding chocolate bark; I think average grocery stores don't start to stock it until the holiday season, and by the time I looked for it I was too late to try far away or specialty stores. I did find something that worked, but it was in the fruit aisle next to the strawberries, not the baking aisle where I expected it.

The cake pops turned out really well. As you can see in the slideshow above, Elena helped to make the cake, but she had to go to bed before we got to the fun parts. They made Jenny's birthday extra sweet.

We're very happy with our new home, which feels like it's twice as big as our old apartment, although according to the square footage numbers the size difference isn't quite that large. For instance, in our new place we've divided the main living area into two parts, each of which is probably larger than our old living room. Although Elena tends to spread her toys out all over, in principle we'd like to keep them mostly on her side--that's where the toys get put away at the end of the day.

On the other side we have a functional fireplace, which we haven't yet put to use. The wall it was on looked too flat, so we took a trip to Ikea with the goal of finding something that would add depth. We decided on a simple shelf, not a full mantel per se , but it achieves the desired effect.

Elena's favorite part of the whole place might be the stairs. She likes playing on them with her beach ball, although I usually have to participate. We sit down at the bottom of the stairs, then lean our heads back so we're looking up at the top, but from an upside down perspective. I throw the ball up to the top, then we watch as it bounces down, and try to catch it when it reaches us.

With all the extra room, we're slowly retrieving all the stuff that has been stored at our parents' houses--for the most part, it's been there for at least a decade. Most recently, Jenny's mom brought another van load up, including Jenny's extensive ceramic mask collection. She and Elena had a great time unwrapping and looking at all of them, but the time has come to thin out the collection. Due to Elena's still developing spatial awareness, there were a few casualties, but they were on their way out anyway, so Jenny wasn't too heartbroken. She's keeping the ones that she really likes, but we're still looking for suggestions about what to do with the rest. Should we put them up on craigslist or freecycle them? Are there collectors who might be interested, if we just knew how to contact them? Suggestions welcome.